There is this one thing that I often have to remind myself … For who am I doing and saying things that I do? The answer is: for nobody else but myself.
You have to stay true to yourself. You cannot go around and try to please other people if you do not in first step please yourself.
I’m starting to notice something pretty funny: people will judge you no matter who you are.
If you like to laugh, they’ll eventually say you cannot be serious. If you love having serious talks, they’ll say you think too much. If you are a person that doesn’t like to push themselves in the center of attention, they’ll say you are boring. As soon as you do something that puts you in the centre of attention without knowing so, they’ll say you are an attention seeker.
At the end of the day, they’ll want the version of who you are not and not a version of who you are.
Even parents … They should be our number one supporters. Families are different and sometimes they “fail” us, but that should have been their “task”. And yet … Sometimes, they’ll say you only think about yourself. If they want you to do a task for them, they expect you to do it with a smile. When you ask them for a favor and they are having a bad day, you expect them do to a task with a smile. But we are constantly forgetting two things. Nobody is perfect. And everyone have multiple versions of themselves, each of those we should accept if we do love and support them.
Everyone have a bad day sometimes. Everyone feel like they are not true to themselves from time to time. Every person sometimes feels like experimenting in order to find their true selves and their true personality. Based on their mood, they might react differently. If you are mad, you can end up talking in a higher tone that might upset your loved ones. If you are happy, you can talk in a calmer and positive voice. This means, again, we have many versions of ourselves.
Instead of giving people space to do so and accepting every version and every form of them, we often end up judging them. We often end up wishing they were different.
Well, guess what? Nobody should change themselves for the wish to be accepted among others.
I am learning another thing: being confident gets you to better places in life. When you walk the streets with a raised head, a smile on your face, clothes on your body that makes you feel good, wearing make-up that suits you and your soul – everything changes.
You believe in yourself. You understand that no matter how little you are, you can do extreme things. You could help change the world if you wanted to do so.
Out of nowhere, meeting new people (making new friendships and new relationships) makes everything so much easier. Why? Well, when you feel good in your own skin, you stop questioning yourself. You stop doing things to please others – questioning whether things you say are the right things, whether your behavior is the one that they accept – and start doing everything you can to please yourself and nobody else.
If you are going to be silly, loud, in the centre of attention, funny – do so because of yourself. Do so when you believe that is the right thing.
If you are going to be calm, peaceful, serious – again do so because of yourself.
If you want to be a mix of both of those from time to time, that is okay as well. As long as you believe in yourself and do that because you think it’s the right thing.