It took me a longer time to talk about this certain topic and I don’t quite know why, but it’s time now! I get a bit upset when people talk about complaining like it’s a bad thing.
Alright, I get your point of view – I feel drained around people who are constantly negative and full of anger and stressed out … It’s not pretty. It’s harder to talk to them, you always feel like you’ve done something to make them feel that angry and you just … You don’t want to be around those people. I get it. However … I see a certain beauty of complaining.
Let me explain. I think having a completely honest relationship is very rare nowadays, it’s simply hard to speak your mind up. People respect their privacy more and nobody is as dedicated to another person as they are to themselves.
When you complain, you express an emotion. Just as you do when you cry, laugh, etc. It means you trust somebody enough with a piece of your soul. I truly do think there is beauty in being completely honest with somebody and that includes having to complain.
We all get angry, but we have to find a way to stay respectful. I don’t like people who always feel like they need to comment everything. They roll their eyes, they shout over a person who is talking respectively to them … It’s rude.
However … It’s a lot easier to pile up stress and not open up, then it is to speak up about something that bothers you. When you complain, you don’t necessarily ask for encouragement or an advice, you simply want to let your feelings out of your soul. You want the person to know that you are feeling angry and you know what? They might or might not relate, it depends.
I’d take an honest person over a passive-aggressive one, anytime. At least you know where you are at. DON’T FORGET! It’s important that a person knows how to embrace your feelings, as well. They have to be opened up towards you, as you are towards them. And you know what? In my experience, honest people normally are like that. Passive-aggressive ones, on the other hand … They’ve always got so many grudges, but they never speak up about them. They’ve got so many rage inside of them, but you never know why. And they are always allowed to be moody and negative, but they never understand you might feel the same way from time to time.
I’ll accept your complaining, as long as you can move on afterwards and as long as I know I can trust you about my anger, as well.