Largest Temperature

CONFESSION: I’m not that close to people

Does anyone else feel like meeting new people and making new friends is a huge pressure? I find myself having trouble trusting people at all. I used to like being close to people, I used to like letting my friends know about the things I was thinking about. But, lately, I feel like I’ve changed. I feel like it’s harder for me to get close to people. It’s harder for me to talk about my past, my present, my future …

It bothers me a lot that I don’t have the same relationship with some people that I used to do. It bothers me that my friends don’t feel like they can come up to me when they need to talk and it bothers me that I feel like I can’t come up to them. We’re all living in our own bubbles, being too afraid of making legit relatinships and we’re all so obsessed with privacy and peace. I say there’s nothing wrong with being faitful to yourself and taking time off for your thoughts. But we’re all so … Unemotional, wouldn’t you say so?

I don’t feel comfortable around people that I don’t know well, because I never know what is going on in their head. I like knowing what does someone feel based on their mimics. I like saying the “right” words – those that somebody “wants” to hear. I can’t truly commit to somebody if they are cold and … Unavailable? Is that the right word? I can’t commit to a person that I don’t know well. I can be cold and unavailable myself, too. I can’t even count how many time I have pushed people away, but not because I wanted to get my “revenge”. It’s because it didn’t feel right for me to be close to certain people.

I feel like … Everyone is this way. A bit detached and private. I don’t know what to do in order to wake some feelings in some people. And it goes the other way around – I don’t know what could some people do in order to wake my feelings. If you aren’t “feeling” a certain relationship with a certain person, then that’s that.

I wish I could openly talk to my friends about some things that I am writing about instead. Maybe it’s better that I don’t, because these … Waves of emotions … They come and go.

Rant over, my friends.

Advertisements

7 comments on “CONFESSION: I’m not that close to people

  1. dertalmid
    December 1, 2016

    I know what do you mean, never been in your shoes, but had many friends who were… Heard many stories…

    Like

    • largesttamara
      December 9, 2016

      Thanks for letting me know that! It means a lot. And I hope you don’t get to experience it, because I personally prefer being emotional and close to people, anytime 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • dertalmid
        December 9, 2016

        It comes and go… I don’t know why does it happen. I just live throughout this phase and moving on… till the next time.

        Liked by 1 person

      • largesttamara
        December 9, 2016

        Yes! I love that comment, it comes and go … I truly feel that way. Sometimes I feel more close to people and sometimes less. It’s all a part of our lives, I guess 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • dertalmid
        December 9, 2016

        I guess all creative people need that temporary estrangement to gather an energy.. just guessing… sometime on the contrary to miss that closeness and when you come back it engulfs you

        Liked by 1 person

      • largesttamara
        December 9, 2016

        That makes a lot of sense! I always have more artistic ideas when I am a bit estranged 😀

        Liked by 1 person

      • dertalmid
        December 9, 2016

        the constant search for an inspiration, exhausts mind… same people too…

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Information

This entry was posted on November 7, 2016 by in psychology and tagged , , , , , .
%d bloggers like this: