A conversation with my mother brought me to this new post. I really just wanted to express the fact that I want people in my life to openly talk to me about things. I feel like I won’t be angry if somebody expresses an opinion … I’m angrier and sadder when they don’t.
I can’t behave normally when I am confused about people, I simply need to know where I stand. I need to know about their feelings toward me and about opinions toward things in general. If I feel like something is wrong and you aren’t willing to talk about it … I don’t know what to do.
We all make mistakes, so we shouldn’t feel angry when somebody tells us about them. We should also embrace the fact that we have feelings – that we get upset when people say certain things or we get angry about situations. It’s normal. Not talking about those emotions and hiding them, ignoring them … That is not normal.
I can’t fix a mistake if I don’t know I made one. I also can’t and shouldn’t expect other people to fix their own mistakes and change themselves, when I haven’t told them that I want them to do such a thing. We don’t think the same … Sometimes something that upsets you is the same thing that somebody else hasn’t even noticed.
I no longer have the time or the energy for passive-agressive behavior from people who are constantly angry, constantly the victim in any relationship … The world doesn’t revolve around anybody and we are mature enough (or, you know, I’d expect so) to openly talk about things. I have no time and no energy for confusion and paranoia … “What if I do something wrong again and they get mad at me YET AGAIN? What if I’ll disappoint them? What if I’ll say something wrong?” I don’t have to please anybody and I certanly can’t read people’s minds. Be honest with me, tell me about it, so I can fix it … Or get out of my life.
It’s that simple. I am not going to be hard on myself anymore. I deserve better. That’s that.